Like the First Snow

Soyong methodically put one stitch after another creating a beautiful colorful embroidery. Her hand with the needle raised, pulled the blue string and then moved back, over and over again, shaping the bird’s wing.

The pavilion she had chosen for her embroidery session was in complete silence despite being rather crowded with three concubines joining her each with the company of maids.

Soyong needed to clear her thoughts after another sleepless night. Her mind replayed different scenarios of her serious talk with the King and she couldn’t decide how to bring bad news to him in a gentler way. Maybe if she hadn’t dropped her request to get deposed so abruptly, she would feel less awkward around him.

She must talk to him regardless of how they both feel. The King still has a chance to change his fate as every decision could have shaped his path differently from what Soyong read in historical books.

Alas, they barely saw each other after that crucial talk in Soyong’s natal home. His broken voice when he asked if she truly didn’t want to have children with him specifically haunted Soyong’s mind. She only tried to be rational but she forgot to take into consideration his feelings and the King ended up being hurt.

Soyong shook her head. No, she must focus on herself, there’s no time for sentiments. Her mind must be sharp as an arrow and cold as ice, this is the only way she could survive in the palace which became even more hostile to her.

With the Queen regent gone, the Queen Dowager and Pungyang Jo clan became the most powerful figures in the court. As Choi Sanggung¹Choi Sanggung – sanggung is the 5th senior rank court lady, Choi is her last name. Sanggung is the highest rank attainable by a court lady. explained, the concubines from various different clans were chosen to support the King. Adding new families at rather a solid minister’s office sounded like a powerful move, but still, the Pungyang Jo clan had the majority of positions, and just like the Andon Kim clan, they wouldn’t give it up easily.

Without of protection of her clan, Soyong could rely only on herself. The Queen Dowager outright mocked her upon their short meeting just yesterday. What angered Soyong more, she couldn’t do anything but smile and pretend nothing happened. Even simply recalling that encounter turned Soyong mad with anger!

The move on Soyong’s left made her sharply glance in that direction. Suk-ui²Suk-ui – the junior second rang concubine. Hwa Jin was Bin – the senior first rang concubine, the highest rang possible. The Queen doesn’t have a rang as she is a superior lady in the palace. Yoon, the youngest one, froze with a terrified expression on her innocent face. It looked like she shifted in her seat when Soyong noticed her.

“My apologies,” Soyong softly smiled, relaxing. “You must be feeling uncomfortable sitting so long with embroidery.”

Soyong decided to know the concubines better and offered them to join her this morning. But she failed to start a conversation and their awkward silence led to Soyong’s mind wandering in dark thoughts.

“Is something bothering Her Highness?” Suk-ui Hong politely asked. She has such a cute round face and smart eyes that Soyong felt even guiltier not making more effort to know them all.

“I’m going through some difficulties amidst my family’s situation,” Soyong explained without giving too much of her true concerns. “It would be understandable if you feel different…” Considering they knew Chef Jang’s flirty version of the Queen, Soyong had no illusion she could keep up making their established dynamics. But she hoped they could find something new and they would feel as comfortable around her as they were with Chef Jang.

“Her Highness has nothing to worry about.” Suk-ui Min quickly assured her. “Your Highness is Your Highness regardless of your family’s background,” the concubine’s full lips covered in red lipstick spread to form a smile. If Soyong knew something about Chef Jang, Suk-ui Min would be definitely labeled as sexy in his phone book.

“…embroidery … a bit boring…” Suk-ui Yoon mumbled so quietly Soyong could catch only parts of her words but Suk-ui Hong poked her with an elbow, stopping her before she could complain more.

Soyong couldn’t say she didn’t expect this reaction. Spending the whole morning with embroidery could be found dull. But Soyong just needed something to consume her mind from various worrisome thoughts. However, the embroidery was just a temporary pastime until the person she requested to join them arrived. And by the movement on the path to the pavilion, the person she waited for came just in time to save the awkward situation.

“Sitting in one position for so long is uncomfortable, painful even,” Soyong admitted turning her attention back to concubines. “This is why I prepared something special and fun.”

She rose to her feet, walking towards the entrance to the pavilion to welcome her guest. The concubines, followed her lead, walking to stand behind her and peek above her shoulder. An older woman in a simple but neat hanbok³Hanbok – a general word for clothes. was getting up the stairs followed by a young palace maid who carried the gayageum⁴Gayageum or kayagum is a traditional Korean plucked zither with 12 strings, though some more recent variants have 18, 21 or 25 strings. It is probably the best known traditional Korean musical instrument..

“A music lesson?” Suk-ui Hong asked behind Soyong.

“How that is fun?” Suk-ui Yoon grumbled.

Soyong rolled her eyes; they sounded disappointed yet they weren’t curious to ask her what she meant by “fun”. She didn’t mean to feel competitive with Bong Hwan however she still did. Flirting with women wasn’t something she could or was willing to do but they could build close relationships of other sorts instead. The only person Soyong could call a friend before was Jo Hwa Jin but those relationships were rotten by lies and betrayal. If she must stay at the palace longer, why not make her stay a bit more pleasant with new friends? Besides, if their connection survives long distance once Soyong leaves, she might get news about a King’s life through letters with his concubines.

“Don’t judge before you know the full intent,” Soyong gave them a mischievous smile before turning back and finally greeting the gayageum teacher.

“I’m glad you found time to join us despite the short notice,” Soyong politely welcomed her teacher from the times she was staying at Detached Palace⁵Detached Palace – is the residence of the future Queen before the wedding. It’s not part of the inner palace..

“It’s an honor to get an invitation to the palace from Her Highness,” the teacher bowed, showing her respect.

They parted ways on a rather bad note as Soyong recalled. Back then she tried hard to act as a cruel Queen-select and based on the nickname servants gave her, she succeeded at least in that. Maybe those historians’ theories from books weren’t farfetched with their description of her character. After all, she created that reputation herself, and Bong Hwan’s erratic behavior added extra craziness.

“I must apologize for our last lesson,” Soyong lowered her gaze in shame. “I hope it didn’t leave you in too much pain.”

“Do not worry, Her Highness, His Majesty overruled your order,” the teacher said to Soyong’s surprise.

“His Majesty… was nearby when it happened?” Soyong was shocked to hear that. She always tried to stage her outbursts as far as possible from the King’s eyes. The thought of seeing even more contempt in his eyes was unbearable for her.

“I always met His Majesty after leaving our lessons,” the teacher revealed.

“Always?” Soyong asked again and the teacher confidently nodded.

“How cute!” Suk-ui Yoon exclaimed. “His Majesty probably wanted to hear your play!”

Soyong let out a nervous laugh, covering her mouth with her hand. Back in the day, she suspected the King’s cruelness came only from his hatred of her family, and deep down some affection was in his heart even if he perhaps resented the mere idea of it. Alas, even before their wedding, on that fateful night at the lake, the King couldn’t bring himself to admit it at loud. Just like he apparently hid his interest in her play on gayageum. So many opportunities were missed and now it’s too late as Soyong decided not to share her future with him.

“I’m glad Her Highness decided to resume your lessons,” the teacher brought Soyong’s mind back to reality.

She huffed at the older woman’s words: “I have nothing to learn, I’m already proved to be better than you.”

She heard a very audible squeak from Choi Sanggung. Her friend looked half shocked half miserable she was unable to nag Soyong right here and now.

“You want me to teach those young ladies then?” the teacher tried to act put together but it was visible how Soyong’s words shocked her.

“Oh no,” Soyong shook her head. “I want you to play something… fast-paced and energetic.”

“Your Highness is asking me to play for fun?” the teacher now looked offended. “I’m teaching young ladies playing gayageum for all my life! This is not…”

“I can’t bring a kisaeng⁶Kisaengs were women from outcast or slave families who were trained to be courtesans, providing artistic entertainment and conversation to men of the upper class. here,” Soyong interrupted the teacher. “It would be too scandalous!”

If there were levels of offense, the teacher showed the highest ones at this point. To know that Soyong summoned her here to play for everyone’s entertainment was outrageous enough but discovering that she was a second choice after a kisaeng must have shocked her to the core.

“Are we going to dance, Your Highness?” Suk-ui Min curiously asked.

“Better,” Soyong turned to concubines again. She felt so excited to finally tell them. “Let’s exercise through dance, it will be fun and help us stay healthy.” Soyong took the whole chest of air before declaring: “Let’s do Zumba⁷Zumba is a fitness program that involves cardio and Latin-inspired dance.!”

Everyone shared confused looks and whispered the unfamiliar word to each other and shrug in response. Hong Yeon and some other maids looked curious too and only Choi Sanggung didn’t share everyone’s excitement upon learning something new.

“Let me show you,” Soyong signalized to the maids to clear space from embroidery frames and sitting pillows. Then nodded to the gayageum teacher to start playing and the latter reluctantly sat down by the railing and the sound of lively music finally flooded the pavilion.

“First, we need to warm up,” Soyong said, starting from a simple pattern of steps she learned in Zumba classes. Every time, when the focus was needed on a specific motion or body part, she would give directions: “Step! Step! Hands! Turn!”

The most clueless and innocent concubine broke first, Suk-ui Yoon enthusiastically joined Soyong and moved with such effort she probably would be tired first. By seeing her having fun, other concubines joined too, and soon they all giggled while moving and swirling following Soyong’s directions.

“Aaaaand…  shoulders!” Soyong shook her shoulders stepping forward. This was the start of a more artistic part of Zumba that contained elements from various dancing techniques.

Soyong briefly glanced to the side where the maids stood and saw them tapping their feet intact with music and waving their bodies from side to side. Only poor Choi Sanggung looked like she was about to cry. Soyong could swear, she heard her older friend whimpering a few times. One was when Soyong raised her skirts to show leg movements better and the other time when she waved her hips provocatively. Even the gayageum teacher paused for a second but after Soyong’s quick look at her direction, resumed her play.

“You all doing good!” Soyong encouraged concubines, as she moved back without looking where she was stepping.

And in that moment her back bumped into something or someone. The music stopped instantly and silence dropped in the pavilion. Soyong turned around, breathing heavily, and saw no other than Jo Hwa Jin with her maids on the tail.

“Eui Bin⁸Bin – the senior first rang concubine, the highest rang possible. Jo Hwa Jin is Eui Bin or Royal Noble Consort Eui., you should join us, it’s so fun!” Suk-ui Yoon cheerfully invited Hwa Jin to join their activity. The latter didn’t look so amused and Yoon’s smile quickly disappeared.

“Maybe another time,” Hwa Jin politely declined. “Your Highness, I hoped you could join me at the fire range?” Hwa Jin turned all her attention to Soyong.

Soyong pondered for a moment if she could refuse without starting unpleasant rumors among concubines. Everyone at the palace knew she and Hwa Jin were rivals but the rest of the concubines considered the royal noble consort a friend and it might make it difficult for Soyong to start her own friendship with the concubines. According to Hong Yeon, Bong Hwan picked concubines with help from Hwa Jin as it was kind of their project to help the King.

“I believe we have something to discuss,” Soyong finally answered. “I will meet you there after changing clothes.”

Soyong’s relationship with Jo Hwa Jin was never usual even on their friendship days. Coming from rival clans they never visited each other’s homes despite being neighbors. They often talked through the wall or had to sneak from their homes and secretly spent time together at swings. However, one day, not long after Soyong saved the boy from the well, Hwa Jin abruptly cut ties with her. Soyong called for her through the high walls of Hwa Jin’s estate times and times again until Hwa Jin’s nanny walked outside and told her Hwa Jin didn’t wish to meet her again.

But being stubborn, Soyong tried different ways to find out the reason for such a sudden change. She wrote letters and sent servant’s kids with messages however Hwa Jin never responded back. Soyong gave up only when she overheard girls from other noble houses maliciously gossiping with Hwa Jin about her. It hurt Soyong too much to try to reconnect with a former friend. After that, she focused on her studies and spent most of her time in the company of Kim Byeong-in.

It hurt even more when years later Soyong discovered the man she had fallen in love with was pinning over Hwa Jin. The talks about how perfect fit for the position of Queen Hwan Jin could be if not the corrupt Andon Kim clan didn’t help Soyong’s stance at the palace. Her confidence was slowly fading away until the utter desperation made her walk into the cold water.

And yet, out of spite, Soyong felt the need to make a dark omen for her rival. She thought if Hwa Jin decided to continue building her relationship with the King based on lies from eight years ago, Soyong at least could put more fear in her heart.

With changed attire, Soyong walked into the yard with the firing range where Hwa Jin already waited for her, trying to string her bow. For a moment Soyong wondered if Hwa Jin ever regretted their friendship falling apart or if her jealousy of everything Soyong had run too deep. At least for herself, Soyong could tell she regretted her harsh last words at the lake. No one deserves to lose people they love, it was too cruel for her to wish the same thing Soyong suffered herself. Even if Hwa Jin stood low with her lies, Soyong was supposed to be better. Despite what rumors were spread about her, Soyong should have saved who she truly was and shouldn’t have lost herself in the palace’s intrigues.

“You’re here,” Hwa Jin stated upon noticing Soyong’s presence. “I hope Your Highness won’t find archery too tiring after your previous activity.”

“Do not worry about me Eui Bin,” Soyong reassured her in a rather cold tone. She might regret the words she said in the past but they still were in a bad relationship.

“That never crossed my mind,” Hwa Jin fired back with a crooked smile.

Some things don’t change, Soyong assumed, rolling her eyes in annoyance. She walked to the table with various bows and took a random one without checking the strength of the string. Their rivalry didn’t matter anymore to her.

Hwa Jin would shoot an arrow first. She pulled a bowstring, aiming for a moment, and then with an exhale, she released the string. The arrow flew with a whizzing sound and hit right in the bull’s eye.

“Nice shot,” Soyong emotionlessly congratulated her and Hwa Jin simply bowed her head accepting this dry compliment.

It was Soyong’s turn to take an arrow and try her skills. But when she walked to take an arrow, the eunuch loudly announced the arrival of the King with the Queen Dowager Jo. The Queen Dowager was shined with happiness as she pulled the King by his elbow to the fire range. The latter looked like he preferred to be in any other place but this. His eyes when he looked at her were still full of sadness and she shifted her gaze away.

“What a surprise, the Queen is also here!” The Queen Dowager’s excited voice rang across the yard.

Surprise indeed, Soyong sarcastically thought, side-eyeing Hwa Jin. Soyong sighed, she willingly walked into that trap and had no one else to blame.

“How have you been, Jungjeon⁹Jungjeon – Queen or My Queen.?” The King softly asked, his eyes set on her only.

“Thank you for your concern, Jeonha¹⁰Jeonha – Your Majesty., I’ve been doing well,” Soyong politely answered bowing her head. He lowered his sad gaze and Soyong shifted her attention elsewhere. It had been like that for days now, Soyong felt like she was suffocating in those polite short exchanges between them.

“Does His Majesty know that Eui Bin won the hunt on Surit-nal¹¹Surit-nal or Dano festival, is a Korean traditional holiday that falls on the 5th day of the fifth month of the lunar Korean calendar. It is one of the major traditional holidays in South Korea.?” The Queen Dowager referred to the King, trying to draw his attention back to Hwa Jin.

“Congratulations, Eui Bin, you always were extremely good in archery,” The King’s voice was as polite as it was with Soyong. Awkwardness in all exchanges was so apparent to anyone, but Queen Dowager Jo couldn’t be bothered by it.

“While the Queen didn’t even bother to practice,” she casually added, giving Soyong a derogatory glare.

Soyong faked a smile: “Refusing to compete is not the same as losing.”

She had no idea what happened at Surit-nal but she believed Bong Hwan couldn’t compete with such a good archer as Hwa Jin. As a Chef, knives were his preferred sharp object to work with instead of arrows.

“Losing is losing,” The Queen Dowager couldn’t be stopped so easily. Without the Great Queen Dowager, she was oozing confidence more than ever. “Why don’t Your Highness show what she can, what do you think Your Majesty?”

“It’s not necessary…” the King glanced quickly at Soyong but his attempt to save her from the Queen Dowager’s request was rudely cut off.

“I want to see Her Highness’s abilities,” the Queen Dowager insisted.

What a brazen demand, Soyong thought glaring at an older woman with the same amount of hostility. The Queen Dowager even dared to interrupt her pitiful King! Soyong couldn’t let this woman walk away with an easy win in her games.

Soyong took an arrow from the quiver and put it in place on her bow. The Queen Dowager looked full of herself, seeing Soyong complying with her request but her smile quickly vanished when Soyong raised her bow aiming at her. The King by the Queen’s Dowager side didn’t even flinch, and Soyong could swear she saw a hint of smirk on his face for a brief moment. Making a wide arch, she moved her aim from the Queen Dowager and everyone else presented, making them gasp, before settling it on the target. As she released her arrow, it flew right to the center of the target.

Soyong turned back to look at the Queen’s Dowager shocked face: “Not wanting to compete is what it is: not wanting to compete. I have nothing to prove to anyone.”

Making her point, Soyong smiled again, this time sincerely because the Queen Dowager’s distress made her especially happy. If the latter thought she could trample on Soyong without consequences because it felt like Pungyang Jo was currently winning she couldn’t be further from the truth. Soyong won’t allow anyone to look down on her and belittle her accomplishments, however big or small.

“I believe I saw everything I needed,” the Queen Dowager declared. Soyong had no doubt this day would be never forgotten and the Queen Dowager would find a way to punish Soyong.

The Queen Dowager left and after a quick glance at Soyong, the King left with her. The spectacle was over.

“Everything went better than expected,” Hwa Jin walked to stand by Soyong’s side, watching the King and her distant relative walking away.

“Wasn’t your plan to lure me here to humiliate me?” Soyong turned to face the concubine.

“It was the Queen Dowager’s plan, I simply played along,” Hwa Jin shrugged unbothered by Soyong’s accusing tone. “I knew it wouldn’t work, after all…” Hwa Jin smirked, “Your Highness is good at everything.”

“Are you mocking me right now?” Soyong’s voice went dangerously resonant and sharp like it happens when she’s angry.

Hwa Jin looked taken aback by Soyong’s strong presence but almost immediately let out a relaxed sigh: “I forgot Your Highness wasn’t here for the past few months. Forgive me, I shouldn’t have talked with Your Highness in such a manner. The last time we talked a lot of harsh words were said…”

“I remember it well,” Soyong still felt and sounded defensive but she noted something in Hwa Jin changed.

Soyong didn’t pay attention to it at their first encounter after she came back and she thought it was due to concubine friendly relationship with Bong Hwan. Now when she thinks about it, the way Hwa Jin presents herself changed. Also, her relationship with the King seemed different, their usual affection is missing in the way they look at each other now.

“Your Highness was absent on a lot of changes in the past few months. If you wish, I could share stories you missed but I want to be frank and tell you where I stand right now,” Hwa Jin looked very confident, it was apparent to Soyong that what was said was very important for the concubine. “Chef Jang, as ridiculous as he was, helped me to see that I am becoming a person I don’t want to be. A cruel one. That led me to decide I no longer wish to live in your shadow. I no longer wish to compare myself to you. Just like you, I have nothing to prove.”

Soyong’s brows rose in surprise, seeing her rival looking so happy saying all of this. But she could understand and feel every word she was saying. Soyong felt the same, could they have reached this conclusion without going through so much pain?

“We might not be friends anymore but I’m glad Chef Jang helped you understand your worth. You never were in my shadow as I never was in yours. Said shadow was created by our clans, we don’t have to play by their rules.”

Soyong felt better saying this to Hwa Jin, especially while she still felt a bit of guilt for her threatening words right before the lake incident.

“But Your Highness, while I rediscover myself, could we go back to where we were in the beginning?” Hwa Jin stepped closer, looking into Soyong’s eyes with hope.

“Friendship?” Soyong asked not fully believing what Hwa Jin was implying but the concubine nodded, confirming Soyong’s thoughts. “Why so suddenly? What about the King?”

“I’m not sure if you heard it while visiting the future, but… Bros before hoes,” Hwa Jin suddenly declared.

“Did you just call the King a wench?” Soyong gasped, not sure if she heard Hwa Jin right.

“How else should call a man who ended a two-year relationship over the ghost?” Hwa Jin puffed out. “You weren’t here and still, he couldn’t help but be drawn to you. I knew it was over. Even if he thought of me as his savior, Your Highness was still closer to his heart.”

Soyong felt a sudden pity for Hwa Jin. She knew that feeling very well. Seeing someone you love being bewitched by someone else was hard. Ironically, it was the same man for them both and they felt jealous of each other.

“No one can go back to the past but we can build something new now,” Soyong reached out her hand. Hwa Jin looked down at Soyong’s extended hand and smiled.

“I let go of my past mistakes and am ready to start fresh,” Hwa Jin agreed, as she reached out and shook Soyong’s hand.

“What do you mean?” Soyong curiously asked with a smile. However, in the next moment, she got an idea of what Hwa Jin could mean by that and felt cold all of a sudden. “It can’t be… Did you perhaps tell His Majesty about…”

“I did,” Hwa Jin proudly confirmed. “I didn’t want my lie holding me back.”

“Are you telling me,” Soyong swallowed hard, unable to form her question properly. “His Majesty knows what I did?”

Hwa Jin looked surprised by Soyong’s reaction and simply nodded to confirm. That was enough for Soyong to drop the bow she used as a sort of cane and pace out from the firing range. She needed to see the King right away. Hwa Jin’s secret wasn’t only hers. Soyong was part of this and had her own reasons why she didn’t expose Hwa Jin before the wedding.

Soyong walked fast ignoring all voices calling for her and asking where she goes. The King was the only one on her mind. She reached Huijeongjeon Hall¹²Huijeongjeon Hall – King’s residence. without even asking if the King was there. She knew he always spent time reading in his residence after finishing all his business. Soyong dropped her shoes off, not bothering how they fell, and ran up the stairs. Never had the hallway of the palace’s buildings felt that long. When she finally reached the doors to his chambers, she slid them open and went in without introducing herself.

As she expected the King returned to his residence after a firing range encounter. He froze halfway through turning the page of his book, caught off guard by her abrupt appearance.

“Jungjeon?” He observed her heavy breathing state after running through the hallway. “Did something happen?” He rose to his feet, rushing to her with his eyes full of sincere concern.

“Jeonha…” Soyong whispered, feeling tears gathering in her eyes. It didn’t take long for them to come. “You know,” she sobbed, making the King even more confused with the little information she gave him. “You know…”

“Probably but you better tell me what exactly,” the King seemed awkward and dumbfounded. He raised his hands as if he wanted to hold her but changed his mind and tried to reach for her hands instead but seemed not confident enough to touch her.

“You know what I did eight years ago,” tears ran down Soyong’s cheek. “Jeonha have nightmares because of what I did…” She sobbed harder between sentences. “You suffered so much… Jeonha almost died!”

“This is what made you so emotional?” The King chuckled as if she didn’t pour her soul out in front of him. “Why are you crying? Jungjeon has saved me, so do not cry, it breaks my heart.”

“My tears are not what is important right now, Jeonha!” Soyong whined, how he doesn’t understand? He must think about himself! He must live a long happy life not suffer from demons of the past or be worried about her.

“What can I do, Jungjeon, your tears are very important to me,” he reached out, wiping them away with his thumbs, cupping her face in his large palms. His previous awkwardness disappeared and confidence came back in his voice: “I will never turn away from your tears, Jungjeon. Not again.”

“Jeonha…” Soyong whispered but the King inhaled sharply making her stop.

“You have no fault in what happened to me,” the King peered into her eyes, still holding her face. Soyong sniffled and reluctantly nodded.

She still felt incredibly guilty for causing so much pain for him. Not only eight years ago but now as well. Being selfish was hard for Soyong because her heart held so many contradicting emotions regarding the King that it was almost impossible not to feel anything at all for him.

Soyong wanted to be out of the sight of his kind eyes and far away from his soft voice calling her Jungjeon with such affection. Soyong knew he might feel like he liked her now but it was temporary. Because he felt guilty. Because she helped him in the past. But he doesn’t really know her. He’s not aware of the darker side of her. The side of her that threatened Hwa Jin once and used her power to flog servants so she could escape the palace. Or her ignorance that made Kim Byeong-in suffer so much.

She still hadn’t changed that much. She still wants to escape to an easier life. Her poor King who smiles so fondly now doesn’t know what kind of person she really is.

The King let go of her face and she felt cold immediately. He walked to one of his commodes and pulled one book out of the stack. As he returned to her, he handed an old book to her. Soyong knew this book very well. It used to be neat as new but now it’s all in dirty stains with frayed page edges but Soyong still recognized her mother’s book.

“It took too long for me to return this to its owner. I am sorry for not recognizing you,” he sincerely apologized, looking softly into her eyes.

“It came back to its rightful owner after eight years,” Soyong whispered, caressing the cover with her fingers, stopping at the new inscription that said her name.

“We cannot turn back all of our missed opportunities. However, I will never misunderstand you or confuse you with another again,” the King promised in the same soft assuring voice.

“I must apologize too,” Soyong admitted. “No matter what you say, there’s part of my fault in what happened to you. Not only back then, I’m too kept this secret just like Hwa Jin.”

“If you feel so guilty still,” The King pouted his lips, locking his hands behind his back. “Then you can compensate it.”

Soyong sighed but the King shook his head: “It’s not what you think.” She blinked, since when he can read her mind so easily?

“Can you share a meal with me every evening? Even if you’re so certain leaving the palace is the best option for you, let’s part ways having more happy memories instead of teary ones. What you say?”

The King tilted his head to the side, waiting patiently for her reaction or answer. Her long pause probably made him believe she was about to refuse and awkwardness returned in the way his voice changed:

“If you feel uncomfortable…”

“No, Jeonha, I think it’s an excellent idea,” Soyong quickly assured him. She did ponder for a moment but it felt like a great opportunity to get closer before revealing the news of uninventable betrayal. It will be uneasy to hear that someone close to him could harm him. And better when a reveal like that comes from a friend.

“Then I see you tonight?” The King smiled brightly.

And maybe if he sees her true colors his foolish thoughts of romance between them vanish, Soyong thought.

“See you tonight,” she nodded with a mischievous smile.

==== POST CREDIT SCENE ===

Jo Hwa Jin had pride like any other girl in love but the needs of the politics led her beloved King to marry even more women and there was nothing she could do about it. At first, she felt extreme jealousy and told Wonbeom he must refuse to marry new concubines. However, as it seemed inevitable, she decided to accept concubine selection after all.

She told herself that she should trust Wonbeom.

She told herself these women were not a threat to her relationships with the King.

She calmed herself over and over again…

But her heart sunk a bit every time the Queen was mentioned in any conversation.

Kim Soyong was out of the picture with Bong Hwan replacing her but Hwa Jin still lost her sleep. Because Wonbeom was changing. It happened slowly; so slowly she didn’t notice at first.  The changes in the King became more apparent with Queen’s disappearance as if separation made him stop hiding what he felt. The longer it lasted the more it seemed his dedication to return of Kim Soyong wasn’t driven by his guilt feeling alone.

He has missed her.

Hwa Jin’s tormenting thoughts led her right to the King’s study and she started actively participating in the concubine’s selection. She glanced at Wonbeom, who sat by her right hand, and she noted he showed zero interest in concubine’s names. All his focus was on picking families that he would benefit from.

Hwa Jin returned her attention to the list of names of young women and for the first time thought that maybe if the King was enthusiastic about selecting them she would feel a little bit better. It’s Soyong she couldn’t accept as a rival.

Hwa Jin shook her head, trying to push those thoughts away. She would feel jealous of concubines too. She truly loved him and wanted the King all for herself. Her relationship with him started because she wanted to have something Soyong couldn’t. And the silent competition they had led Hwa Jin to lie at her first daytime encounter with Wonbeom two years ago. But she really fell for him. He became her dream and Hwa Jin couldn’t imagine herself without him.

She glanced at him again. Wonbeom was too occupied in his research to notice her.

And he? Could he live without her?

There was an even more terrifying question: could he live without the Queen?

Hwa Jin turned her head to her left and shuddered at the sight of Bong Hwan in the Queen’s form observing her with a loving gaze as he rested his face on both hands. It was still so bizarre for her to see Kim Soyong and know it’s a completely different person inside.

Bong Hwan of course participated in a selection of concubines and was very vocal about inviting as many pretty candidates as possible. However, he never forgot to remind Hwa Jin that she’s his absolute favorite. Hwa Jin found it ridiculous as she heard him say the same to the Queen’s maid Hong Yeon.

“I’m so happy you decided to help us,” Bong Hwan brightly smiled. “Why do you sit so far away?” Without fully standing up, he loudly shifted his chair closer to Hwa Jin’s. She gasped when he winked at her.

“We were sitting quite close already, Chef Jang,” Hwa Jin noted politely, trying to shift away.

“If you want to fool around, you two must do it elsewhere,” the King’s strict voice didn’t let Bong Hwan time to respond with more flirtatious phrases.

“Why? Can’t take a real competition, Jusang¹³Jusang – the King, usually someone of higher rank could call the King like that, Great Queen Dowager for example. On the show, BH thought of himself higher and called him like that.?” Bong Hwan teased. “I might be a woman now but I’m still better than you.”

Hwa Jin didn’t expect the King to interfere and the thought of him feeling jealous made her cheeks heat. However, her excitement vanished once she turned to look at the King. He didn’t even raise his head, still fully focused on reading the family registers of the clans he picked.

“You’re distracting me,” Wonbeom responded. “Invite all the women you want from families I picked, I do not care. Just let me work in peace.”

“Victory! Yes!” Bong Hwan made a strange motion with his arm, moving his fist forward and then sharply moving back to his waist. “I might like staying here for longer!”

“Oh-ho, don’t say that nonsense!” The King slumped the family register he read on the table with such force both Hwa Jin and Bong Hwan jumped on their seats.

Hwa Jin’s heart ached at the realization that only the Queen could distract him. She wasn’t mentioned directly. No one said her name. But Bong Hwan’s words about staying here instead of Soyong led to the King’s annoyance.

“Almost three months passed, Your Majesty, maybe it’s time to consider the possibility of Chef Jang remaining here in Joseon,” Hwa Jin quietly said, watching the King’s reaction attentively.

“Eui Bin!” The King called her looking surprised by her words.

“Ya!” Bong Hwan loudly opposed.

Hwa Jin’s heart sank, hearing the King calling her by a title instead of her name. She’s not his Hwa Jin-ah anymore. The disgusting feeling of rage at the man she loves so much started rising in her chest.

“Did His Majesty ever think Her Highness might like her new life in the future? Perhaps it’s better for her to stay where she is now!” Hwa Jin stood up from her seat. “If His Majesty really concerned so much regarding her well-being you would agree what’s the best for her, am I wrong?”

“Ya, Hwa Jin, didn’t you forget to ask what I think?” Bong Hwan asked angrily but he was ignored by both Hwan Jin and the King.

“The Queen’s return would be the right thing for everyone,” The King tried to talk calmly but his voice shook a bit with emotions.

“Right!” Bong Hwan agreed somewhere on the back. Again, no one paid attention to him.

“What if she doesn’t want to,” Hwa Jin continued, unable to stop the escalation of their argument. “Could you live with the situation as it is?”

The King’s gaze was so sad, begging her to stop. She could read his eyes pretty well. As he could read hers.

“I must apologize for my wrongdoings, it would be impossible…” the King finally said. It wasn’t the true reason. He knew that. Hwa Jin knew that too.

“Does Your Majesties’ feelings are more important than hers?” Hwa Jin wanted him to feel hurt.

Wonbeom blinked, surprised by her words: “That’s not what I meant!”

“Then admit it… Say the real reason you want the Queen back,” Hwa Jin held back her tears. They never argued that much. The King always was kind and considerate of what she felt but he changed. She’s not the sole holder of his heart anymore. Even her lies couldn’t grant her the happiness she hoped for with the King.

The King let out a sigh: “Do you really want me to say it?” his voice became incredibly calm and composed.

She hated it.

She hated this conversation.

She hated she couldn’t stop it from happening.

His eyes turned to be so sorrowful that Hwa Jin couldn’t handle it anymore. She ran out of the room and stopped only when she was outside and far away from the King’s study. Tears dropped on the ground as she sobbed hard, mourning her broken relationship. If she avoids his answer, it won’t change anything. Their love ended after two happy years. Running away was a cowardly move, Hwa Jin knew that, and yet couldn’t stay there and face the truth.

“Eh, do you have to be this cruel back there?” she heard Bong Hwan’s voice from the back. Hwa Jin wiped her tears with her sleeve before turning to look at him.

“It has nothing to do with you, Chef Jang,” Hwa Jin couldn’t care less what he thought about her words. Her heart was broken, nothing else mattered to her.

“You two are torturing each other too much,” Bong Hwan stepped closer. “This is why I prefer fun and light relationships. Breaking up is painful as it is, there’s no need to make it worse with… whatever you two doing.” He shook his head.

Bong Hwan raised one hand: “Jong-ie wants to spare you from pain but ends up tormenting you more…” He raised his other hand: “Meanwhile you’re trying to ignore the truth and leading him to behave as he does and hurting herself more in the process which hurts him as well.” He clasped hands together: “In conclusion, you ended up tormenting each other maximizing each other’s pain.”

Hwa Jin hated to hear it. She hated how precise this strange man from the future was.

“Do you have friends?” Bong Hwan suddenly asked.

What a bizarre question, Hwa Jin thought.

“Of course I do! O-Wol is my closest friend…”

Bong Hwan interrupted her, brushing off his hand: “Eh, she’s your work friend at best. Do you have friends to whom you don’t pay?”

Hwa Jin pondered for a moment, going through all her acquaintances but she couldn’t name even one name. They were people she had to communicate with in society but she couldn’t call any of them a friend. The only person she ever had a friendship with was, ironically, the Queen. But Hwa Jin ended this friendship because of how many people compared them and she always ended up losing to Kim Soyong.

“Why do I need a friend?” Hwa Jin turned her head away, trying to avoid the question and his attentive eyes. “I have everything I need…”

“You don’t have a friend who would sit by your side, listen to you, and say “Girl, forget this man, he doesn’t deserve you!” whatever it’s true or not.”

“You could be that person.” Hwa Jin rolled her eyes, his games with her were something. He just saw her crying and already making a move.

“I can’t, I have my own interest in you. It must be someone who doesn’t have a hidden agenda,” Bong Hwan brushed off this idea to her surprise. “I don’t use girls’ distress for my benefit. It’s a low move and I have high standards, believe it or not.”

Hwa Jin lowered her eyes to the ground: “The Queen used to be my unlikely friend,” she confessed suddenly. Something about this man from the future made her trust him. Maybe because eventually he would leave and take all her secrets with him.

“tsk-tsk-tsk, did you throw away a friendship over the King? Bros before hoes, ever heard of this saying?” Bong Hwan shook his head, looking disapproving.

Hwa Jin blinked and shook her head.

“Bros as brothers or friends and hoes as wench or kisaengs. Anyway, it means friendship comes first and you don’t trade it for a romance. Hoes come and go, the friendship is forever.”

With those words, Bong Hwan turned and walked away in the direction of his residence. As Hwa Jin looked at the Queen’s back, her thoughts wandered back to the beginning. When it all started. Kim Soyong didn’t care what everyone said about her and Hwa Jin. Hwa Jin thought it was because in those competitions Soyong always won and it was easier for her to ignore whispers behind her back. But those whispers changed with Hwa Jin working hard to become the most noble lady in Hanyang¹⁴Hanyang was the capital and largest city in Joseon. It was the center of the country’s government and home to the royal family and high ministers. As a result, the city hosted a constant undercurrent of political intrigue between various factions vying for control of the government. Now it’s Seoul – the capital of the Republic of Korea (South Korea). and Soyong seemed still didn’t care. Unlike Hwa Jin. The more people talked the more Hwa Jin got obsessed.

“Oh…” Hwa Jin sighed with realization.

Author’s notes:

1. Thank you all for reading, commenting, and giving kudos! I hope you like this story so far. We’re approaching the fluff part of this fic because, as I said before, the biggest drama will be later.
2. The archery part was inspired by MrQueen’s script book itself. In the early scene where the Queen and Hwa Jin meet at fire range, the Queen actually made two attempts to shoot an arrow: one time missed (was on screen), and the second time she shot into bull’s eye (was cut. Correction: her arrow hit HJ’s who hit bull’s eye and she commented her arrow watched up with HJ’s. The point thill stands.). I think the writer wanted to emphasize the duality of her character. The missed attempt was from BH and the successful one was from real SY.
3. I’m cheating a bit with HJ’s character development happening behind the scenes. Originally I planned to write the story linearly with SY’s pov being in the future where she met almost all characters as their reincarnations and BH’s story in the past but I decided to jump to the middle when SY is back -> therefore flashback scenes that supposed to be part of real chapters (mostly).
4. Behold, the wooing phase is here!

• 1
  Choi Sanggung – sanggung is the 5th senior rank court lady, Choi is her last name. Sanggung is the highest rank attainable by a court lady.
• 2
  Suk-ui – the junior second rang concubine. Hwa Jin was Bin – the senior first rang concubine, the highest rang possible. The Queen doesn’t have a rang as she is a superior lady in the palace.
• 3
  Hanbok – a general word for clothes.
• 4
  Gayageum or kayagum is a traditional Korean plucked zither with 12 strings, though some more recent variants have 18, 21 or 25 strings. It is probably the best known traditional Korean musical instrument.
• 5
  Detached Palace – is the residence of the future Queen before the wedding. It’s not part of the inner palace.
• 6
  Kisaengs were women from outcast or slave families who were trained to be courtesans, providing artistic entertainment and conversation to men of the upper class.
• 7
  Zumba is a fitness program that involves cardio and Latin-inspired dance.
• 8
  Bin – the senior first rang concubine, the highest rang possible. Jo Hwa Jin is Eui Bin or Royal Noble Consort Eui.
• 9
  Jungjeon – Queen or My Queen.
• 10
  Jeonha – Your Majesty.
• 11
  Surit-nal or Dano festival, is a Korean traditional holiday that falls on the 5th day of the fifth month of the lunar Korean calendar. It is one of the major traditional holidays in South Korea.
• 12
  Huijeongjeon Hall – King’s residence.
• 13
  Jusang – the King, usually someone of higher rank could call the King like that, Great Queen Dowager for example. On the show, BH thought of himself higher and called him like that.
• 14
  Hanyang was the capital and largest city in Joseon. It was the center of the country’s government and home to the royal family and high ministers. As a result, the city hosted a constant undercurrent of political intrigue between various factions vying for control of the government. Now it’s Seoul – the capital of the Republic of Korea (South Korea).